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<text id=94TT0203>
<title>
Feb. 21, 1994: Under The Gun In Sarajevo
</title>
<history>
TIME--The Weekly Newsmagazine--1994
Feb. 21, 1994 The Star-Crossed Olympics
</history>
<article>
<source>Time Magazine</source>
<hdr>
POLICY, Page 30
Under The Gun In Sarajevo
</hdr>
<body>
<p>By Zlatko Dizdarevic/Sarajevo
</p>
<p> Zlatko Dizdarevic is an editor at Oslobodenje, Sarajevo's sole
surviving daily newspaper. Translated from the Serbo-Croatian
by Ammiel Alcalay.
</p>
<p> A day after the notable and--as Manfred Worner said on Wednesday
evening--"historical" decision made by NATO in Brussels, I
bumped into a good friend on the street. He greeted me with
a hearty, "Hello, happy fellow," quite unusual given the conditions
in Sarajevo these days. It wasn't easy for him to hide the devilish
cynicism in this greeting, nor could we keep from breaking up
completely.
</p>
<p> We both knew, of course, what the meaning of this "happy fellow"
was. Everyone in Sarajevo who managed to watch TV on Wednesday
night--meaning those who had enough juice left in the old
car batteries to power a set--knew that the reference was
to a much commented-on piece by a member of the foreign press
corps. Amid the general madness following the news of the ultimatum
directed at the Serbs, the reporter had come to the conclusion
that Sarajevans were very happy and satisfied with this "historical
event," that the tormented city found itself overwhelmed by
an unexpected sense of optimism and, one could almost say, good
fortune.
</p>
<p> How can we tell the world that we are far from happy and that
we are not optimists at all? On the contrary, we're desperate
because of the obvious fact that, once again, nothing will be
done. Again, the cunning Serb President Slobodan Milosevic,
along with Bosnian Serb leader Radovan Karadzic, will just take
advantage of the situation for the umpteenth time to prepare
new fortifications. When such powerful TV networks determine
that we are pleased and optimistic in Sarajevo, then we simply
have to become optimists.
</p>
<p> I must say that I was even a little sorry seeing so many good
and conscientious journalists from all over the world getting
so excited, rushing around Sarajevo like little kids, sincerely
convinced that they were participating in some great and fateful
event. We can't really get angry at all these folks who take
their work so seriously. Personally, I'm not even upset about
the reporter, who had declared me a happy optimist. All we ask
is that these reporters listen a little less to what the "historical
figures" at "historical gatherings" have to say and rely a little
more on their own eyes and their own intelligence.
</p>
<p> That acclaimed night in which--so they say--the page of
history turned for our stricken land, we were, my friends and
I, at Asha's cafe. Asha--doctor, pilot, race-car driver--is now a cafe owner. As we stared at a miniature TV screen,
not quite believing what a fuss the world was making over the
latest great swindle, one of our companions seemed to be melting
into ecstasy over everything he was hearing.
</p>
<p> When the news report was over, he turned to us as if he were
carried off by a dream. "Imagine how beautiful the fountain
near the cathedral would be with all those colors and watery
figures," he said. We looked at him, dumbfounded. We reminded
him that this was a historical moment and that the war--so
they say--is coming to an end. "Oh that," he replied. "I heard
about that. I'll buy five kegs of beer tomorrow and call 50
of our friends, and we'll all get good and smashed from joy.
But forget that for now. Let me tell you about this fountain
I saw once a long time ago in Rome. I'm almost sure we could
put something like that up in Sarajevo, over by the cathedral,
because it would really look super there." And then we continued
talking about the fountain.
</p>
<p> Later on, Mr. Worner seemed quite serious and extremely angry
at his press conference in Brussels. We found it very moving
when a journalist advised him to be extra careful, since Mr.
Worner, believe it or not, had come to the "historic" meeting
against doctor's orders. And we were even more moved when he
answered that same journalist's question about the fate of Karadzic's
weapons in the so-called Serb capital of Pale--weapons that
would not come under the control of the U.N. Not even the journalist
understood the answer, nor did we happy campers at Asha's cafe.
</p>
<p> This, of course, is not important. The important thing is that
we had already been identified as optimists so that from our
optimistic corner we could discuss that fountain and think about
drinking those five kegs of beer. We then heard that on this
"remarkably calm and peaceful day" in Sarajevo, as one foreign
reporter put it, "only" 18 people, including three children,
were wounded by "a few wayward bullets." Truly a peaceful day.
</p>
<p> The next day I tried to verify our lack of feeling. Who knows,
all our emotions have been dried up to such a point that maybe
we Sarajevans are really doing the world an injustice, a world
that thinks victory over the forces of evil has finally come
to pass, a world that believes there is true reason for rejoicing.
At Muhammad the barber's, in "the street where the President
no longer lives," as the barber likes to advertise, I encountered
a strange atmosphere. Totally oblivious, like in the old days,
people were talking about a soccer game broadcast from Germany,
and then about whether or not some idiots from a pirate radio
station should be arrested after they called for retaliation
against the Serbs still living with us in Sarajevo for the massacre
in the marketplace.
</p>
<p> Muhammad the barber went on and on about the best thing to do
with the pile of wood he had gathered from digging up tree stumps
all last summer: now there was gas, and it wasn't even that
cold, so he had all this extra wood on the terrace. Should he
sell it, or save it for next year? "Next winter everything will
be back to normal, the occupiers are on the way out, it's all
signed, and peace is coming," I said, half seriously and half
in jest. Everyone stared at me, and a young soldier in camouflage
fatigues scornfully waved his hand: "What kind of 10-day ultimatum?
Are you nuts? So they can say they've agreed to everything,
and they are no longer the problem. It will turn out that we
are the occupiers whenever we go out on a mission."
</p>
<p> Actually, Sarajevo no longer believes anyone. Sarajevo no longer
reacts to any decisions, whether they be truly or only quasi-historical.
Nor does Sarajevo react to any promises, even if the intentions
behind them are sincere and serious--despite the fact that
such intentions haven't been displayed for quite some time.
Sarajevo has seen everything there is to see till now, and it
has felt the worst there is to feel upon its very skin.
</p>
<p> The results are obvious. Until six or seven months ago, every
true Sarajevan needed at least an hour to walk from the Holiday
Inn to the cathedral. You had to stop and say hello to so many
people, to ask after everyone. Now that same distance takes
just 15 minutes because no one stops. No one has anything left
to ask anyone.
</p>
<p> And there are fewer familiar faces. A year ago, days and even
weeks would go by before you heard about someone you knew who
was killed by a sniper's bullet or a shell. Now this kind of
news comes every day. That's precisely why it would be so nice
to build that fountain by the cathedral, full of water and light.
And to be happy, smiling and optimistic, just the way we have
already been envisioned by all those who carry out great decisions
and great ultimatums in the name of historical happiness.
</p>
<p> The only thing I can't figure out is why all this is happening
right now. As if the massacre at the marketplace is any different
from the massacre that has been carried out already against
all of us here. Sixty-nine innocent people were killed at the
market, yet that's exactly how many people die every single
week in Bosnia. Ten people a day for a week: there you have
it, just like the massacre at the market. That's how it's been
for 660 days of this war. And nobody gave a damn. In these 23
months, more than 200,000 people have been killed, and still
nothing. Maybe all those bodies really were just plastic dummies,
like Karadzic says.
</p>
<p> The citizens of Sarajevo, offending everyone as usual, think
the so-called historical event in Brussels is no more and no
less than a great lie. That is why we are neither happy nor
optimistic but completely desperate and full of sorrow. It is
not because no one wants to help us. We don't even pay attention
to the big lie that this is a case of crimes against humanity.
On the contrary, it is clear to Sarajevans that this is a crime
that humanity itself has afflicted upon simple, unassuming people.
</p>
<p> Sarajevans think this business of pulling back the tanks, the
mortar launchers and the other big guns is an absolute farce
being carried out simply to show that, finally, something is
being done. But the whole operation simply marks significant
new gains for Slobodan Milosevic and Radovan Karadzic. What
can a distance of 12 miles mean for those who have missile-launching
systems, aircraft and howitzers? What would the withdrawal of
50 or 100 tanks mean for those who can, with half an hour of
maneuvering, bring in 100 more tanks and an additional 500 cannons?
But the significance of taking 20 guns and both tanks from our
army is all too well known. What does it mean for the army of
Bosnia-Herzegovina, an army that has had to put together practically
every bullet piece by piece?
</p>
<p> Finally, and this is the most important aspect, what do we get
out of this when the operation has been completed? We get a
blockade of Sarajevo moved 12 miles from the city, instead of
3 miles away as we have now. What this really means is that
all the occupied territory will remain in the hands of those
who occupied it by force. But now the newly marked out borders
will be watched over carefully and responsibly by the blue helmets.
Slowly but surely, the demarcation lines will dissolve into
a border line between different "states." This will cement what
has always been the ultimate goal of Milosevic and Karadzic.
Those interested in knowing what this really means can go and
take a look at the place where the Berlin Wall was or the place
where a similar wall stretches across Nicosia in Cyprus.
</p>
<p> Maybe I should be even more explicit: Sarajevans truly think
that for Karadzic, a speedy agreement to withdrawal from the
mountains above the city is only a way of saving his own skin.
It is only a way of saving his army and weapons, only another
ploy to gain time until the world's attention span, now fixed
on the horror of the marketplace, fades, and the story begins
all over again. Soon the idea of a division of Bosnia and Sarajevo
as the only solution will come back in through the front door,
right to the table around which various war criminals will be
seated.
</p>
<p> Where, actually, does the misunderstanding lie, if there is
a misunderstanding at all? It is in the very assumption that
moving the guns will change the minds of those who have been
firing the guns at innocent civilians these two years. Of course
we can disagree about whether 1,000 or 5,000 or 10,000 innocent
people killed constitutes a greater or a lesser crime--if
a crime can even be measured in such a way. As far as I am concerned,
it is totally irrelevant to me after meeting a child whose leg
was amputated. He had gone to bed before Christmas with the
hope that Santa Claus would bring his leg back.
</p>
<p> What do you think--did he get it? And what do you think it
will be possible to talk about with that child one day, and
with thousands of other Sarajevo kids whose hair turned gray
before they even went to school, if they ever did get to school?
It's all the same to me after talking to an 80-year-old grandmother
who, amid the worst bombardment of Sarajevo, walked through
the middle of the main street and at the frantic warnings to
hide because she could get killed, quietly but clearly answered,
"That is why I am crossing the street like this, my son. But
unfortunately, I won't get hit."
</p>
<p> In the so-called historical decision from Brussels, those who
talked about plastic dummies cynically placed at the market
in Sarajevo are not even touched. Maybe they have divined the
real truth: we in Sarajevo are truly nothing more than plastic
dummies with whom anyone can play.
</p>
<p> We can only dream about fountains and sparkling water, those
of us with the strength to dream, endlessly indulging in those
colors and the flowing water. It is no small thing to hear a
boy whose father was killed say, "Last night I dreamt about
my father. I dreamt about him on purpose." Somebody will one
day have to watch out for boys from Sarajevo who dream about
their murdered fathers on purpose.
</p>
<p> Maybe all of this is actually senseless and no use to explain
to anybody outside Sarajevo. Nothing here can be explained to
anybody who isn't here. The questions that reach us from outside,
even from our closest ones scattered around the world, seem
ever more meaningless, less reasonable, more stupid. We have
less and less nerve or ability to answer those questions, to
say anything, to explain anything. We have become a ghetto with
its own logic, its own laws, its own morality and its own imagination.
And of course, its own malice, intolerance and nastiness.
</p>
<p> Between us and the world, the rift is becoming ever more difficult
to bridge. Joy and optimism in the Holiday Inn where journalists
stay are not the same thing as the joy and optimism in the homes
of Sarajevans. When the outsiders sit around a table sipping
wine, and laugh and feel optimistic, they have a reason for
it: it is not a small thing to be part of the big Sarajevo story.
And after that they can head home.
</p>
<p> If there are any traces of smiles left on our faces after all
this, they surely must be the smiles of idiots, smiles that
mean absolutely nothing since true laughter does not live among
us anymore. It is difficult to explain this to people who have
been gathering their precious energy for such a long time only
in order to set an ultimatum, an ultimatum that reminds us of
that joke about a husband who finds his wife in bed with another
man and shakes his finger at her: "If this ever happens again,
I'll really get angry."
</p>
<p> The real mistake made in the big world out there in explaining
our feelings and our reactions stems from the fact that it is
difficult for people to realize that we do not expect anything
and almost feel nothing. How can we expect anything from a world
that in the name of politics and grand strategy refuses to defend
the most elementary principles on which its own foundations
rest? We can no longer be helped by any movement forward or
backward, no matter how many miles it is measured in. We've
already got to the point where it doesn't matter if those above
us continue to shoot or not. It has already been a long time
in Sarajevo since people have stopped running across streets
marked WARNING: SNIPER.
</p>
<p> The other day I heard the following from a university professor
I know. "A friend of mine and I agreed to leave Sarajevo," he
begins, "at least for a bit, just the day when at the train
station, you could buy, like before the war, a train ticket
and sit in the train and actually get somewhere. Until recently,
the two of us had only one problem: when would that ticket booth
open again and when shall we get into a train? The more I think,
the clearer it is that the real problem is this: Where can the
two of us go from here? There is nowhere to go. Except to Podlugovi,
12 miles from here."
</p>
<p> In Podlugovi, to be honest, express trains never stopped, they
speeded on to other distant stations.
</p>
<p> It is important to preserve the smile, even an idiotic one.
And to be an optimist, waiting for the train to Podlugovi. The
important people in the world shouldn't think we are unhappy
about having our legs pulled by all these "historic" moves.
Even plastic dummies should show a little respect for history.
</p>
</body>
</article>
</text>